The X-Factor

I haven't posted anything in a while.  Training over the last month has been really hard.  I had been feeling a little deflated and I thought it would be best to take a break from the blog and not spread any negative energy.

I signed up for the Olympic distance race (1 mile swim, 25 mile bike, 6.2 mile run), incase I forgot to post that earlier.  I'm still totally freaked out by the workout schedule that the coaches put out every week.  Despite the fact that I have been training for the last 6 months, I still have doubts that I can actually run 6 or 7 or 8 miles, even though I have done it a zillion times.  The physical training is nothing compared to trying to win the mental game.  

So I am all in for the team trainings from now until the race.  I just need it.  I need the support of my teammates and I need to know I am keeping up.  Last weekend we did a "mock tri."  A mini race, just with our team, to start getting us used to putting all three sports together.  I never swam with the team this year.  I guess I figured after 12 years of competitive swimming, it was the last thing I needed to work on.  And when workouts had to slip, I always cut out the swim, because swimming is my fall back.  So nobody knows that I can swim.  They only know that I can't run, well, I can, but I am really slow.  So when it came time for the mock tri, I crushed the swim, open water and all.  I think I was the third person out of about 100 people on the team to come out of the water.  I surprised just about everyone, including myself.  It was an awesome feeling and just the boost of confidence that I needed.  

I've never wanted to do anything more than to finish this race.  But after month and months of training its demoralizing to always come in second or third to last on a long bike ride or a long run.  Despite the fact that my bike is a 9 year old "Schwin Super Sport" or the fact that some of these people run marathons.  I always want to do better.  But finishing that swim as fast as I did more than level set me for the rest of the race.  I was able to hold off most of my teammates over the course of the bike ride and despite my super slow running pace, finished right behind them at the end of the race.  

So it felt really really good.  I had to run by myself and that sucked, but I did it.  More than a sprint distance, not quite Olympic distance.  I did it, and felt good and had a little bit more to give at the end.  So, I think I will be ready.  A few more brutal trainings before the race next month, but I think I'll be ready.

A better day

The follow up mammogram went fine today. I'm all clear for another 5 years or so. I have 2 dear friends, Erin and Meg, who lost their moms to breast cancer. Both of them sponsored me for my TNT event. I'll admit that I have been terrified the last 4 days, and the appointment this morning both uncomfortable and frightening. But what I have been through this week can't even come close to what their mothers and their families went through battling breast cancer. So tonight I dedicated my workout to Erin and Meg and I hope I have the chance to sponsor them in the Breast Cancer 3 Day Walk this summer.

I was rushed to do my workout tonight. Kevin was still out of town and I was trying to squeeze in a 2 hour brick in on my way home from work only to get a call from the nanny asking for new diapers. I was so rushed. I got in 18 miles and on my way back to the car I forgot to clip out of my pedals and wrecked my bike. It was the exact same accident as last year when I broke my arm. This time I did not put my arm out. So I now have a mean case of road rash on my thigh, but I did not break my arm! Thank God for the extra cushion on my fat ass. I put in a great 3 mile run later in the evening after Kevin got back from the airport. It felt really good.

My most exciting news of the day, I made my fund raising goal, $5000!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has supported me in this endeavor!! Special thanks to my husband Kevin, Aunt Ann and Papa Tom who helped me in with fundraising to help me me this goal. I promised myself if I could get to $5,000 I would go after a half marathon later this year. I'm all in now!! Once I get past this tri, its running, running, running from here on out.